Mutual agreement, beneficial arrangement, sugar daddy contract—all those words are used to describe the new phenomenon in the modern world—sugar dating. We are going to take a closer look at such a relationship, provide a proper definition and also distinguish the main types of sugar arrangements.
What is a sugar daddy arrangement?
Let’s start with the mutually beneficial arrangement definition. Urban Dictionary defines it as a relationship where two partners benefit, and in this case, this is a sugar daddy/sugar baby arrangement. For example, a sugar baby goes on a date with a sugar daddy, they spend time together, and if it’s not their first date and if they both are ready, get intimate. An SD gets positive emotions, a great date, and/or sex, and SB gets all the same things (usually) + money.
Types of sugar daddy arrangements
Researchers define a few main types of sugar daddy arrangements.
- PPM arrangement wherein SD gives money or gifts to a sugar baby on per meeting basis instead of a monthly allowance. The researchers also assume that in this case, a relationship is based on sex, which is much closer to sex work, but in fact, PPM works for regular SBs and SDs, whose relationships are not only based on sex and therefore, are legal.
- Long-term, exclusive dating arrangement wherein both partners want their relationship to be more like a traditional relationship.
- The hybrid—long-term relationship in which sex is very important, but a baby gets a monthly allowance.
As you can see, this classification is directly related to money and sex. As we have mentioned above, PPM is not just about sex—otherwise, it cannot be even considered sugar dating because companionship is not one of the essentials. However, one of the essentials to discuss is safety dating arrangement: each of the parties should agree upon daddy’s rules for dating (for example, never call each other, never post photos on social media, etc)
However, these are not the only types of mutually beneficial arrangements. There are also the following subtypes:
- Platonic relationship
- Online sugar dating
- Travel partner
- Exclusive relationship
- Polygamous relationship
According to sociologist Maren Scull, assistant professor at University Colorado Denver, there are 7 sugar daddy relationship types.
They are compensated dating, sugar prostitution, sugar dating, compensated companionship, sugar friendships, and sugar friendships with benefits and pragmatic love. Let’s take a closer look at each of them.
The material or monetary compensation for attending a specific event, grabbing a meal or coffee. This type is very popular in Asia. It does not suppose the partners to have sex with each other.
The exchange of presents for sex. No friendship is involved in these relationships.
It supposes intertwined life and being companions with sex. The vast majority of females get an allowance on as-needed, monthly or weekly basis. The sums might vary from $200 to $2,000 – $3,000.
The female becomes more intertwined in a male’s life. It does not involve anything sexual. It supposes only being companions for some compensation.
It supposes relationships based on friendship.There is nothing about sex in here. There are two categories of such relationships: the ones with pragmatic love and the one with benefits.
Sugar friendships with benefits
The woman considers someone to be her friend. Sometimes, this person should pay for vacations, cars, clothing, cell phone bills, rent, and other living expenses. Meaning, a woman gets material things for just being a good friend of a man.
Sugar friendships with pragmatic love
It is when 2 people hope to end up together. The female must be taken care of for the rest of her life, and in return would gladly provide sugar daddy gifts, her love and support. It must be mentioned that sometimes such relationships appear unintendedly and might last for a few decades.
To sum up, this is how Scull defines and distinguishes the types of sugar dating. However, in reality, there might be even more subcategories of sugar baby arrangement types.
As you can see, sugar arrangements can be very, very different. Let’s take a look at some sugar baby arrangement examples—it can help understand how these types of relationships actually work.
Sugar baby arrangement examples
All of these types of sugar relationships can be mixed and interconnected. Here are some sugar daddy arrangement examples—common scenarios in sugar dating.
Online relationship only
Online and/or Platonic sugar dating. Let’s say there is a sugar baby who isn’t looking for intimacy. She can create an account on one of the sugar daddy websites and indicate that she is looking for a Platonic relationship. Then she discusses the terms (including payment) with sugar daddies who contact her, finds out what they are looking for—real dates, online interaction, regular texting, Skype dates, etc., finds out if it works for her and if the price is good enough and then makes her decision.
This sugar baby agreement is one of the safest ones because you should not meet up. So you will not have any physical abuse or sexual contact. The sugar daddy, however, might ask for some photos or want to have a phone sex. According to this SD SB type arrangement, no one will see you in public. Suppose you want to move on with your relationships, you will have to agree where you will meet up with each other.
Friendship and companionship
Traditional sugar dating (long-term or just dates). Let’s say there is a sugar daddy who wants to find a sugar baby. First, he decides if he is looking for long-term relationships with one SB or just dates with one or many babies.
Considering this, he should decide what type of payment (monthly allowance ($2,500 on average) or pay per meet ($300 on average)) works better for him. Then he signs up for the site, looks for candidates in his city, contacts them, and if they meet each other’s expectations, they meet in real life and start dating (if they like each other, of course).
There is a sugar daddy and sugar baby contract. There, sugar daddy is looking for an uncomplicated relationship, according to a mutually beneficial arrangement. Perhaps, they might have too much drama in their own family life, are very busy, or have demanding work.
Sex is not always involved in sugar dating. However, sometimes a Sugar Baby and a Sugar Daddy have intimate relationships. It might be included to their agreement, so they know what to expect from each other. Note that such an agreement is legal. So there is no offence to take place. It is not a criminal offence to have sexual relationships, according to some agreement, according to Zita Spencer, a solicitor at Olliers.
A sugar baby may also indicate that she is looking for a mentor and look for sugar daddies who don’t mind sharing their experience and helping her make great career/business/personal growth decisions. This is also discussed before they start dating.
The sugar daddy is supposed to be an expert in some field. According to the sugar baby contract, this arrangement is a kind of development and learning partnership. Sugar daddies make good mentors because they have the connection and expertise.
A sugar daddy may look for a woman who’d be his travel partner. And again, it’s discussed—in most cases, they meet each other online, get a bit closer, and SD asks if she has a foreign passport/visas, if she is ready to travel abroad, meet her in person a few times, and if there is chemistry, they plan their first vacation.
Also, lots of sugar daddies have business trips due to their job. To make traveling less boring, they might invite a young charming lady to join them. According to the sugar daddy agreement, the sugar baby will follow him wherever he goes. It is such a nice opportunity for ladies who want to see the world and meet new people.
All these scenarios have differences but there is also a standard scheme: people who may meet each other’s criteria meet online, tell each other what they expect, discuss all the terms, meet in real life, and decide if they want to start dating.
Find popular sugar baby profiles at Secret Benefits
Find popular sugar daddy profiles at Secret Benefits
The vast majority of sugar babies and sugar daddies define mutually beneficial relationship as a job. So the money must be discussed. You might either receive your sugar daddy allowance:
- Every meeting
The amount of your allowance depends on how much you meet up. Your meetings might depend on the quality of your relationships as well. If you enjoy the company of each other, you are more likely to meet up again and again.
In some cases, sugar daddies date their sugar babies two times per week or a few times per month. Note that some sugar babies are available only in a specific area or time. So sugar daddies should travel to them.
There are various methods to receive the allowance of sugar daddies:
- Bank deposit
- Prepaid card
- Bill payment
The allowance varies from city to city. In some places, sugar babies receive more. Asking for an allowance, you should consider the living expenses.
So, what is a mutually beneficial sb/sd arrangement? It is the arrangement between the parties, a sugar baby and a sugar daddy that works for both of them in all the aspects, from payment type to the frequency of dates.